My First and Last Date With Pierce Brosnan

Sunday night I had a first date at a Caribou Coffee shop in Fairfax.  I met this man on Ok Cupid, and was intrigued by his writing. On his profile, he expressed himself so well. He made some statement about emotions and intimacy being so closely tied together that I figured every girl on that site must find such a comment so refreshing.

Typically, men are afraid of emotions, right? Plus this is a site full of 20-somethings that are obviously looking for sex rather than a relationship. So, yeah, when a guy isn't afraid of emotions, I take notice.

We messaged a few times before meeting in person. Again, I liked how much he wrote since I tend to write novels compared to the haikus that are frequently exchanged on dating sites.

When I saw him in person, my first impression was disappointment. He looked like a grown up frat boy. I could just imagine him wearing loafers without socks paired with shorts and a polo. Isn't that so snobby of me? I thought so too. So, I pushed that first impression out of my head and tried hard to listen what he had to say. Maybe his personality would overcome his bland dressing.

On paper we would seem to have a lot in common. We both have kids. The ages are similar. He and I are both soccer players. He recognized my Barca scarf in my profile pictures. We both work in education. We have similar schedules. But...?

Well, there was no spark. He wasn't funny. Damn. Those emotions made him so intense and serious. And he looked at me with such attention that I felt under a microscope. Because he kind of looks like Pierce Brosnan, his one eye squinted while he listened to me talk which further reinforced who his doppleganger is.

Patiently, I suffered through his stories of travel soccer schedules and gymnastic classes until he finally said something interesting. He tried to convince me that men need to be as careful as women when it comes to online dating. One woman he dated four times became obsessed with him. Not only did she talk nonstop about his kids, but she stalked him. As he ate dinner at home with his kids one night, he saw her sitting in her car. Watching them.

But his interesting story wasn't enough. Besides, I walked away feeling like he was a perv. Too easily he talked about divorced people needing sex if they haven't gotten any in a while. That Pierce Brosnan stare silently asked if I would offer him the relief he was seeking. I tried hard to signal with my body language that no, I was not the girl for his needs. Any guy who uses the word "horny" on a first date makes me feel uncomfortable.

Glad that the hour was up and that we both had commitments to dash off to, I lied about seeing him again. I didn't know what else to say. Thankfully, the disinterest was mutual because neither of us have contacted each other since that night.